An interview with Nena
Nena born March 24th, 1960 (Aries)
Nena is always looking for alternative ways to stay in touch with her devotees. (pixabay photo)

If happiness were an animal, what would it be?
I imagine a raccoon. A big, fat, placid raccoon, replete and dozy in the shade of a large tree.

Your work is often stressful. How do you face it?
To strengthen my spirit, I periodically doze on a hammock made of rough sandpaper and nails liberally sprinkled with vinegar.

Do you have any new tattoos?
Yep! I have a white gopher on my back. It contains a GPS, so I can be salvaged if I get lost in a storm of snow, but unfortunately it works better if I'm a little undressed.

What would Nena do to solve the problem of ferocity and violence that is menacing present-day world?
I think that appointing a hired gun to every citizen can solve many problems, but most legislators are rapacious decrepit punks scarcely attentive to my brilliant suggestions.

Can you tell me the square root of 505127648?
Are you joking? Even a drunk prairie dog can answer that, provided it has a transplanted thumb and a smartphone.

Which is your next musical venture?
I'll soon release a cryptic album of death metal covers of Elvis Presley greatest hits, sung in Greek, Polish and Czech. I worked on it for 7 years.

Which is your favorite book?
I'm quite enthusiastic about "The Picture of Dorian Gray" by Orson Wide.

You surely mean, by Oscar Wilde?
Surely you are confusing the book with the movie, however we can agree to disagree.

Nena refused to let me know her home telephone number, but here are a few random numbers you can dream about :
2737081032 3221737471 7983601397 5731993092 7839684364 8151060308 2384577604 5648454293 8851828860 965129086 489170060 506617622 9176305711 4742695386 4978795408 5654319077 6209652353 4843594834 8170365388 6552099165
To be frank, my boss had arranged my short exchange with Nena several weeks beforehand. Regrettably, my pet weasel got jaundice, so I had to skip the talk. So, the interview above is mainly the impression of a nightmare I had after a large dinner based on beans and salami.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.