An interview with Nicholas D'Agosto
Nicholas D'Agosto
Nicholas D'Agosto born April 17th, 1980 (Aries)
The main pastime of Nicholas D'Agosto is collecting old door knobs and door handles (pixabay photo)

If you could choose someone to reincarnate in, who would it be?
Probably Indiana Jones.

With all due respect, you know that that's not a real person, don't you?
It's not!? How could you say that to me so empty-heartedly!?

Could you suggest a remedy for common cold?
Yup! Here it is my guaranteed remedy for common cold. Mix one part of brandy, three parts of instant coffee and some black vinegar. Drink the resulting brew every 25 minutes for 5 hours.

You're brilliant in "Final Destination 5". Were you given plenty of room to mold your character?
Totally! There was a writers' strike, so I had to improvise most of my dialogues.

If you’re at karaoke, what’s your song of choice?
My true love is dodecaphony.

I heard that you will soon be busy with a charity football match. Care to tell us why'd you decide to undertake such a titanic effort?
It was my best friend's idea.

And since when did you feel an urge to fight allergy?
Since my best friend contracted it.

Do you ever Google yourself?
Not so often anymore. Say every three hours. But lately Google often says "Including results for Nicholas D'Agasto", who apperently is a former stockbroking dealer from Milwaukee. That's quite saddening, but not as much upsetting as finding that according to Yahoo my name is similar to a revolting curse in Yiddish.

Here is a list of numbers I have already excluded from being Nicholas D'Agosto's home telephone number :
9589252274 4719036223 866869461 6862936644 7511497864 6217471731 3375707568 7139156245 843259856 3156693780 230650294 4852480082 5184003604 7937529765 3005569670 248712762 3830242673 5799224244 3998419209 8314122717
To be sincere, my chief had patiently scheduled my meeting with Nicholas D'Agosto several months beforehand. Unluckily, I got stoned watching a rerun of "Ultraviolet". So, the transcript above is mainly the recollection of a nightmare I had following a heavy dinner based on deep-fried Mars bars and cabbage stew.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.