A talk with Nicole Beharie
Nicole Beharie
Nicole Beharie born January 3rd, 1985 (Capricorn)
Vimbadoo, the adored pet pigeon of Nicole Beharie, also doubles as a low-carb appetizer in case of protracted famine (pixabay photo)

Nicole, can you share with us a memory of your role in "Shame"?
Oh my heck! To put it mildly, the set "was a place of ruin and despair, ruled by an evil bear who smelled of strawberries!".

Who were you in your first school play?
It was rather humiliating. It was a play on the life of Pablo Picasso. I played the Incredible Hulk until somebody got smart.

If you could choose someone to reincarnate in, who would it be?
I'd have to say Dr. Hannibal Lecter.

Not to offend you, but you know that that's not a real person, don't you?
I need to call my agent.

On a scale of one to ten, how popular do you think you are?
I dunno. I think I'm a two in Bulgaria, but an eight in Boston.

You are always fit. How do you do that?
I have embraced the Blue Diet: in the month of September I eat exclusively blue foods, like blueberries, robin's eggs, blue potatoes and my special Smurf meat pie.

What would you like to do right now?
Take a shower to forget the stench of failure you send forth.

When your are not acting, which is your favored pastime?
I think that collecting and trading dummies is quite relaxing.

Almost surely none of the following numbers are Nicole Beharie's private telephone number :
8338558798 2938033803 4176664412 872352225 2361544229 6457871042 870593617 7035506190 3286042030 5363355236 9978403773 3858337145 3011112809 2280382395 8991191145 9581007222 3694131647 8848175101 6832038397 894051909
I have a confession to make. My chief had patiently lined up my brief conversation with Nicole Beharie many months beforehand. Unfortunately, I decided at the last moment that I had better things to do, like learning Chinese or cultivating mosses. So, the transcript above is essentially the elaboration of a nightmare that followed after a heavy dinner of raw onions and beans.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.