A conversation with PJ Harvey
PJ Harvey
PJ Harvey born October 9th, 1969 (Libra)
PJ Harvey, partecipating under false pretence, has obtained an onorable 15th position at the Beard and Moustache Championship (source)

PJ, how do you invest the money you made in your career?
I asked myself: "What's popular with people?" and the answer is magazines! So I bought 2000000 boxes of magazines which I stashed in my pool, where they will lie until the price goes up.

If you didn't grow up to become known as the singer PJ Harvey, what do you think you would have done?
I would have enrolled at Wake Forest University, signed up for Ancient Croatian 101, failed, and bailed out a year after that with a fernet addiction.

What’s the best sound in the world?
Between you and me? It is the placid sound of a roll of new banknotes touching each other. But please, write instead something more crowd-pleasing, like "the jubilant laugh of a light-hearted kid " or "the first word of your child".

Your work is often stressful. How do you face it?
To make my ego tougher, I periodically sleep on a bed made of fresh nettle.

What do you think about the international situation?
It's hard to believe it when you live in a pink cloud pampered by capable servants, but there are nations where it is impossible to find even a so-so cosmopolitan.

How would you illustrate your songs to somebody who'd never heard it?
Well, I've heard there are one or two such fellows in Texas or on the Himalaya mountains. I would say that my songs are like a fragrant vanilla cupcake with an astounding filling made of chili peppers.

Don't you think it is time you write a book on your life?
Jawohl! It is deplorable that I have so little time, if any, to put down the words, as we writers like to say. Recently I've read the outline of the condensed version of "Twilight", and I found it quite acceptable. Hence, I told my agent to pay a visit to the author - a certain Stephenie Meyer - because I need a ghost writer so badly, but for the moment I've not heard any news.

Which is your forthcoming musical venture?
I'll soon release a vinyl-only experimental album of hip-hop covers of Michael Jackson greatest hits, sung in Bengali, Icelandic and Polish. I believe it will be the masterpiece of my career.

There is no possibility any of these is PJ Harvey's home telephone number :
9912660274 833163905 3961853310 705289489 3816331281 615851889 8736847028 8335683332 3464680774 789813748 371581181 2206311404 2009729193 9534553228 4621620758 7321534065 992395086 2433616894 8265961038 4989634779
I patiently sat tight for many weeks for an occasion to have a short exchange with PJ Harvey. The resulting article was amazing, like "The Godfather" rewritten by Captain America. Hence, it was disastrous that my dog (probably on purpose!) destroyed my only copy! After I recovered from a mild intoxication, I made an attempt to recapture those amazing words. To be aboveboard, I'm not one hundred percent confident this web page is an absolutely factual run-down of our interview, and I'm beginning to wonder if it ever was real...
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.