What motivates you to act?
I hear a voice that motivates me. Her name is Carol. I'm sorry, but Carol says you are a loser.
Which is the most embarrassing DVD in your collection?
Fee-fi-fo-fum! Excluding "Twilight", probabably it is "Jaws: The Revenge" or "Aeon Flux".
Patrick, your zodiac sign is Scorpio. May I read you your horoscope?
OK, but I don't believe in zodiacal gibberish.
You will meet an erratic stranger from Sacramento, a former flower grower named Eric with two left feet. He will approach you with a map signed by the egregious pirate Edward "Blackbeard" Teach, that places his stash in a submerged mine in Nebraska. Don't follow him home!
Augh! You are dead on!
If you could choose someone to reincarnate in, who would it be?
Surely Mary Poppins.
I don't want to offend you, but you know that that's not a real person, right?
I think I'm gonna cry now.
Do you do your own shopping?
I would love to, but I'm so hard-pressed performing crucial things for the planet that I can't care about such trifles. Actually, I hire a crew of NASA PhDs to compile my grocery list and e-mail it to a squad of pro buyers spread around the planet. For the garnments, I ever employ a crew of stand-in, each sharing with me one body part measure.
What do you think about president Donald Trump?
I'm a little preoccupied, since I heard rumors that president Trump wants to finance a research that suggests the vaccines are a figment of liberals.
• e-mail: yutmeyut -at- gmail.com • Disclaimer & Privacy •