An interview with Patrick Warburton
Patrick Warburton
Patrick Warburton born November 14th, 1964 (Scorpio)
Patrick Warburton is presently writing his unauthorized autobiography, a monumental work soon to be released in montly instalments. (pixabay photo)

What motivates you to act?
I hear a voice that motivates me. Her name is Carol. I'm sorry, but Carol says you are a loser.

Which is the most embarrassing DVD in your collection?
Fee-fi-fo-fum! Excluding "Twilight", probabably it is "Jaws: The Revenge" or "Aeon Flux".

Patrick, your zodiac sign is Scorpio. May I read you your horoscope?
OK, but I don't believe in zodiacal gibberish.

You will meet an erratic stranger from Sacramento, a former flower grower named Eric with two left feet. He will approach you with a map signed by the egregious pirate Edward "Blackbeard" Teach, that places his stash in a submerged mine in Nebraska. Don't follow him home!
Augh! You are dead on!

If you could choose someone to reincarnate in, who would it be?
Surely Mary Poppins.

I don't want to offend you, but you know that that's not a real person, right?
I think I'm gonna cry now.

Do you do your own shopping?
I would love to, but I'm so hard-pressed performing crucial things for the planet that I can't care about such trifles. Actually, I hire a crew of NASA PhDs to compile my grocery list and e-mail it to a squad of pro buyers spread around the planet. For the garnments, I ever employ a crew of stand-in, each sharing with me one body part measure.

What do you think about president Donald Trump?
I'm a little preoccupied, since I heard rumors that president Trump wants to finance a research that suggests the vaccines are a figment of liberals.

I will not deceive you by falsely stating that Patrick Warburton's secret telephone number is listed here :
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I have a confession to make. My boss had patiently set up my brief exchange with Patrick Warburton months beforehand. Regrettably, I got stoned watching a rerun of "Return of the Killer Tomatoes". So, this web page is mainly based on what Patrick Warburton would have probably answered if I have met him, as suggested by a telephonic poll involving a couple of random people.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.