Cookie Consent by A talk with Paul Simon
A talk with Paul Simon
Paul Simon
Paul Simon born October 13th, 1941 (Libra)
Paul Simon's experiment to launch his perfume for man redolent of durian fruits essence has been an inevitable fiasco (source)

I've heard you are writing an autobiography. Is it true?
Yes! It is unfortunate that I have little time to write. Recently I've read the abridged summary of "The Metamorphosis", and I found it quite palatable. On that account, I've asked my agent to call the author - a certain Franz Kafka - because I truly need a ghost writer, but for the moment I've not heard any news.

One of your hits, "Mother and Child Reunion", is a well known song of love. Does it also have a second meaning?
Naturally! It really is about my love for bbq sauce.

Paul, how do you invest all the dough you make with music?
I'm not supposed to tell anybody, but I invested my stash in a super-clever scheme developed by a financial guru named Charlie Punzi, a pro of hedge futures trading (whatever it means). I will give you his number, but he has been incommunicado in the last few weeks.

Paul, which is your secret for unblemished skin?
Only few know it is a sponging with lukewarm cement twice a day.

Have you ever had a supernatural experience?
Well, I remember that several years ago I was crossing Iran in an old minivan with a friend. You know, one thing led to another and so we did "that" in the meadows, in the heart of nature.

What do you eat between meals?
Lettuce leaves with salt and pepper, a pickle, two plums, and a bit of vermouth.

Do you have any birthmark?
Definitely so! I have a little squid shaped birthmark on my right shoulder. Probably my father did have a nightmare involving a squid while my mother was pregnant.

Can you tell me the square root of 609274325?
I will not dignify you with an anwser, not even a wrong one.

I will not deceive you by falsely stating that Paul Simon's private telephone number is listed here :
7902628903 9989960936 7883642035 9211963196 2416673891 3353873470 4191691708 7865930505 6143196602 7038222516 6741575869 8984348705 6543296921 9935084838 8012912803 2178620634 931578554 8854513961 6911652143 532782045
I lined up a hurried interview with Paul Simon many weeks in advance. The resulting transcription was breathtaking, like "Angela's Ashes" rewritten by Doctor Doom. Thus, it was awfully untoward, to put it mildly, that my neighbor by accident devoured my only copy! After I took my medications, I made an effort to recall those great words. I want to be honest here: I'm not one hundred percent sure this web page is an entirely factual report of our rendezvous, and so I'm starting to doubt it ever was real...
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.