A talk with Peter Frampton
Peter Frampton
Peter Frampton born April 22nd, 1950 (Taurus)
After an innocuous curious accident with his blimp, Peter Frampton has lived for 5 months in the Liberian rainforest. He was alone, apart from his dog Timbo and his strong will (source)

Do people yell your name and applaud everywhere you go?
Holy mackarel! They simply can't have enough of me. I'm all-embracing: I move famed heirs and nondescript accountants to the same extent. You know? There are at least 13 boulevards with my name in two different countries, not counting Botswana and Ivalice, which I did not know they were countries.

You have been the recipient of several awards. Which is the first award you ever won?
At the age of 5, I won the "Platinum Coyote Award" issued by the city of Memphis for "superlative but superfluous singing achievement".

Do you know any good hay fever cure?
Here it is my instant cure for hay fever. Mix one part of red wine, two parts of ground coffee and some chives. Guzzle this brew every 15 minutes for 2 hours.

Which is your favorite book?
I really love "The Wonderful Wizard of Oz" by Frank Boom.

You surely mean, by Frank Baum?
I seriously doubt it, however I've heard it both ways.

What do you think about the international situation?
It's hard to believe it when you live between cushions cuddled by adoring fans, but in these injured times there are nations where it is difficult to find even a just adequate cheeseburger with or without mayo.

Do you have any superpower?
Humph! I can see the spirits of deceased obscure clowns, but only on full moon nights. I think this is quite atypical in tall people with Chinese forebears.

How would you describe your songs to somebody who'd never heard it before?
It is difficult to think there is such a miserable fellow! As my fans often say, my songs are like a sweet banana cake with a stunning filling made of sausages.

Almost surely none of the following numbers are Peter Frampton's secret telephone number :
9393410384 2242514800 485378747 5999910866 8418525972 6098674315 7724801655 5938172827 2812236001 2678045962 7420283568 975768729 294778665 443909747 9438860188 6548633094 3374321056 4813654652 4016355495 9787292368
Clearly, singers are frantic people. It's difficult for them to fix a meet for an interview. So we decided to leave Peter Frampton peacefully alone and obtain the interview above without his help. Hence, this web page is an a cybernetic transcription we obtained from a computer simulation of Peter.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.