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An interview with Sarah Hyland
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Sarah Hyland
Sarah Hyland born November 24th, 1990 (Sagittarius)
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One of Sarah Hyland's most firm resolutions is to obtain soon a license for flying a dirigible (source)

Your line of work is often stressful. How do you face it?
To fortify my soul, I frequently doze on a bunk made of rough sandpaper and poison ivy.

Could you tell us what's your earliest memory?
I'm the testimonial for a new parfum called "My Earliest Memory", so I cannot speak about the subject without asking my laywer.

I would like to test that parfum on innocent passerbies.
If you believe the contract, it will be distributed only in Shangri-La and Tonga.

Should you give up acting, which kind of career would you choose?
Probably that of geoduck farmer. I already have quite an experience in that field.

Have you ever had a supernatural experience?
Ah, good memories... Years ago I was crossing Hungary in an old sedan with a friend and we did "it" in the forest, under the moon, in the heart of nature.

Do you like to cook?
To be honest, I think that cooking is a big waste of energy, since there are relatives and canteens more than willing to deliver my daily dose of vitamines and fats. In the few occasions I indulge in cooking for my disciples, I like to improvise salads. My cornerstone is a mix of pulled pork and seitan, which I believe can accomodate both vegs and normal people.

Could you share the recipe with us?
By all means! You take the pulled pork and the seitan and you make a bunch of sandwiches using some baguettes.

Sandwiches?
It does not matter, I derived the recipe from one for a sandwich. So you make those sandwiches, then you dispose of the bread and mix pulled pork and seitan with some sour cream and voilĂ , you are done!

Almost surely none of the following numbers are Sarah Hyland's home telephone number :
8109535946 2847336927 504483426 9258070240 2897905747 8037304507 7248169955 9875992151 9054021379 8543844525 7800045972 8766036609 6688581338 759586040 4178866970 6284256622 636053663 4458044293 3116203336 813128591
I patiently planned a brief meeting with Sarah Hyland for months. The resulting transcription was wondrous, like "The Lord of the Rings" rewritten by the Lone Ranger. It was very unfavorable, to put it mildly, that my doctor by accident (I assume) devoured my only copy! After I took my medications, I tried to remember those awesome words. So, to be frank, I'm not one hundred percent confident this web page is a totally truly chronicle of our exchange, and I'm starting to ask myself if it ever was real...
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.