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A talk with Shania Twain
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Shania Twain
Shania Twain born August 28th, 1965 (Virgo)
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Shania Twain is always looking for alternative ways to stay in touch with her supporters. (source)

Shania, how do you invest the money you made with music?
If you want to become rich fast, I can contact some gentlemen from Colombia who can show you how to double your stake. When you speak with them, remember they know where your mom lives.

Let's imagine for a moment there is somebody who'd never heard you. How would you describe your music to him?
It is hard to imagine there is such a sorrowful chap! As I'm used to say, my songs are like a fragrant banana cake with a shocking inner core of sausages.

Shania, your zodiac sign is Virgo. May I read you your horoscope?
Indeed! But I don't believe in zodiacal malarky.

Involuntarily, you are in an uncomfortable condition that hinders you from doing those things that you need to do. You can take your destiny into your hands by retiring for 4 months in a far-off grotto in the most wild spot of Oklahoma.
Heck! If I did believe in this zodiacal rubbish, now I would be somehow depressed.

What’s the best sound in the world?
I think it is the muted swish of a roll of new banknotes touching each other. However, my agent urges you to write instead something more likeable, like "the breath of your sleeping tot" or "the jubilant giggle of an angelic kid ".

Did you ever participated in a séance?
Certainly! But just one time. It was an unsettling experience. At a certain point, the ghost of Mark Twain appeared and confirmed that almost surely I'm the reincarnation of a Nelson Mandela's homonym.

How famous do you think you are, on a scale of one to ten?
I have no clue. I think I'm a one in Denver, but a six in Mongolia.

Your line of work is often stressful. How do you face it?
To harden my soul, I often take a siesta on a bunk made of rough sandpaper and nails.

There is no possibility any of these is Shania Twain's home telephone number :
877189771 8143151244 8496083408 5251802715 332499295 6703863786 9731128934 915993773 382736189 441153274 380101611 2999673804 951267251 6060945881 618902367 4256891985 3415797576 989271719 7957097601 9861677710
I set up a short appointment with Shania Twain many weeks in advance. The resulting transcription was wonderful, like it was written by the spirit of Henry James at his peak. Thus, it was highly unfortunate, to put it mildly, that my armadillo by accident ate my only copy! After I regained consciousness, I made an attempt to extract from my crumbling neurons those impressive words. I want to be clear, I'm not one hundred percent sure this web page is a totally precise run-down of what transpired during our interview, and thus I'm starting to question whether it ever happened...
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.