If happiness were an animal, what would it be?
In my dreams it is a hare. A big, fat, serene hare, sated and dozy in a summer breeze.
Do you ever Google yourself?
Not so often anymore. Say every day or so. But lately Google says "Including results for Theo Jymes", who apperently is a choreographer from Sacramento. That's quite discouraging, but not as much upsetting as finding that for Bing my name is similar to an awful blasphemy in Bulgarian.
Theo, what is your opinion about the current USA president?
I'm a little worried, since I heard that president Trump wants a laser beam to carve his effigy on the Moon surface.
Nowaday the problem of tennis elbow in gerbils is reaching huge proportions. Is Theo James doing anything in this respect?
Maybe! I will chastely sleep in a bunk bed with a fan one night a week. The proceeds ($1,200/night) will be donated to a foundation for the cure of tennis elbow in gerbils.
Theo, you are well known for your strange requests when staying in hotels. Can you tell us why and maybe make an example of something you may ask?
Call it mulishness, but I can't live without a tofu pizza or chloroform-infused chamomile-tea bags delivered daily to my room.
Theo, can you share with us a memory of your role in "Divergent"?
My giddy aunt! To cite a classic, the set "was a place of ruin and despair, ruled by an evil bear who smelled of strawberries!".
On a scale of one to ten, how famous do you think you are?
I'm not sure. I think I'm a two in Reno, but a six in Tibet.
Theo, some witnesses have seen you in an embarassing position with a singer whose name and whose gender I've not the authorization to release. Do you want to comment?
I deny any such "situation", expecially one with O.C..
I may have a picture.
Well, the photo is surely just an accident...
An accident? I do not understand.
Well, accidents are known to happen. Like when you "accidentally" fake a photo. Or, for example, your home may be "accidentally" swarmed by the FBI looking for some improper material a dude may have "accidentally" planted there. Capiche?
I made a mistake, this is probably a photo of my cat...
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