An interview with Tom Waits
Tom Waits
Tom Waits born December 7th, 1949 (Sagittarius)
Tom Waits always uses a rigorous method to choose his next move (pixabay photo)

I'm here tonight with Tom Waits, who just saw the birth of his last album. Hi, Tom, and welcome to Celebrity Hammocks.
It's a pleasure being here, your pleasure.

If you could choose someone to reincarnate in, who would it be?
Probably Forrest Gump.

With all due respect, you know that that's not a real person, right?
WITHOUT all due respect it IS real, I saw it in a movie.

Where do you go when you die?
In a cemetery, generally. If you are cremated then your remains can get scattered, most of the times in a place you hate.

What’s your biggest defect?
A few people say that when I'm concentrated I have a predisposition to put little objects behind my ear, like a comb or a corn cob.

I read that you will soon be busy with a charity concert. Can you tell us why'd you decide to undertake such a humble effort?
I was obliged by my parakeet, who wouldn't stop repeating how it would have been such a good idea.

And since when did you feel a need to address the issue of laryngitis?
Since I imagined to have it.

What do you eat between meals?
Parmesan cheese slices with Thousand Island dressing, a burger, three broccoli florets, and a few drops of rum.

Almost surely none of the following numbers are Tom Waits' home telephone number :
9104245433 7135689376 6915394132 9132068876 5348468184 9663277587 9115712141 419089583 5554850174 9613322729 5565842319 3949762676 874893443 8764150185 5517999119 321258188 723521852 984540781 799433129 3753364587
To be sincere, my boss had scheduled my appointment with Tom Waits many weeks beforehand. Unluckily, I decided at the last moment that I had more interesting things to do, like cultivating lichens or visiting Canada. So, the interview above is mainly the impression of a dream I had following a large dinner based on liver sausages and raw broccoli.
Other interviews worth checking:
Donald Trump Beyoncé Knowles Leonard Cohen Billie Piper Emile Hirsch Odette Annable Joel Edgerton Rhona Mitra Kellan Lutz Ioan Gruffudd Idris Elba Jessica Simpson Van Morrison Brittany Daniel Leslie Mann Carly Rae Jepsen Brooke Shields Christina Applegate Idina Menzel Frank Grillo
NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.