A conversation with Woody Harrelson
Woody Harrelson
Woody Harrelson born July 23rd, 1961 (Leo)
Woody Harrelson always uses a rigorous way to choose his next movie (pixabay photo)

Could you authenticate the buzz about the purloined Bigfoot pictures?
Thou, reeky tickle-brained skainsmate! How do you dare?

A fictional character you think to as an inspiration?
As a poll suggests, Cristiano Ronaldo, because of our similar way of life.

Do you have any scar?
Sure thing! I have a tiny gerbil shaped scar on my right knee, a souvenir of my traumatic brawl with a deranged jackal.

Can you share with us a memory of your role in "No Country for Old Men"?
By golly! All the leading characters were chewing corn beef flavored candies all day long.

Do you Google yourself often?
Say every other day or so. But lately Google says "Including results for Woody Horrelson", who turns out to be a retired recruitment consultant from Indianapolis. That's quite dispiriting, but not as much upsetting as finding that for Bing my name sounds like a revolting insult in Japanese.

What would Woody Harrelson do to solve the problem of ferocity and violence that is threatening our society?
Well, I think that donating one million of dollars to every person can make many problems go away, but most politicians are just selfish fossil blokes scarcely attentive to my brainy advice.

Could you suggest a remedy for indigestion?
Sure, in case of indigestion, mix three parts of sparkling wine, two parts of coffee and some relish inside a coconut, then drink the resulting mixture every 25 minutes for at least 4 hours.

Who were you in your first school play?
I remember it well. It was a play on the life of Goethe. I played the midwife, so my part lasted about 15 seconds.

After extensive reserch I concluded the following list doesn't contain Woody Harrelson's private telephone number :
322254795 304247502 8985001536 3018237572 8218986261 4959609632 3234695822 9770040532 7678285421 2901976939 7966058192 6448735563 3605762137 588984514 7420666357 8170191292 9522647171 756206966 3492967530 4856350798
To be honest, my boss had arranged my little appointment with Woody Harrelson weeks beforehand. Regrettably, I decided at the last moment that I had more interesting things to do, like cultivating mosses or collecting kerbstones. So, the interview above is mainly based on what Woody Harrelson would have probably answered if I have met him, as indicated by a telephonic poll involving a couple of his fans.
Other interviews worth checking:
Donald Trump Vanessa Williams Jermaine Jackson Russell Crowe Sam Claflin Ricardo Montaner Eric Clapton Hugo Weaving Michael B. Jordan Lindy Booth Ellie Kemper Cary Elwes Dannii Minogue Elias Koteas Joel Kinnaman Dannii Minogue Mark Ruffalo SofĂ­a Vergara Cary Elwes Olly Murs
NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.