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A conversation with Yvonne Elliman
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Yvonne Elliman
Yvonne Elliman born December 29th, 1951 (Capricorn)
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Her early breakfast when she wants to travel light (pixabay photo)

Where do you go when you die?
The cadavers do not wander. They tend to stay where you lay them.

Yvonne, some witnesses have seen you in an embarassing setting with a singer whose name I'm not authorized to tell. Do you care to comment?
I deny any such "situation", expecially one with X.K..

I may have a photograph.
Well, I think the photo is just an impression...

An impression? I do not understand.
Yes, just an impression. Like when you have the impression everything is totally fine in your life and then for no apparent reason your dear one and your car blow up. Are we on the level?

I was joking, there is no picture at all...
If you didn't grow up to become known as the singer Yvonne Elliman, what do you think you would have done?

I probably would have become a pro "Grand Theft Auto" player.

I've heard you are writing an autobiography. Is it true?
Indeed! It is unlucky that I have little time, if any, to put down the words. Last week I've read the back cover of the book "Siddhartha", and I found it quite passable. Therefore, I've asked my agent to pay a visit to the author - a certain Hermann Hesse - because I need a ghost writer, but for the moment I've not heard any news.

If happiness were an animal, what would it be?
Probably a panther. A big, fat, tranquil panther, well fed and sleepy in the shade of a large tree.

After extensive reserch I concluded the following list doesn't contain Yvonne Elliman's home telephone number :
933369474 865180465 913958588 5100501342 8966993669 651287336 854105525 5715748559 6571914810 8926022332 409712015 2212587138 9800621110 626521612 321130373 9752451306 438733865 2893087104 547191175 8655552737
To be sincere, my chief had arranged my hurried talk with Yvonne Elliman many days beforehand. Unfortunately, I realized at the last moment that I had more interesting things to do, like visiting Canada or breeding mites. So, the interview above is mainly the impression of a nightmare that ensued after a heavy dinner based on wild boar stew and chorizo.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.